The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

On second thought let’s not go to the galaxy; it is a silly place.

It’s a tale as old as 1978: man escapes Earth just as it’s about to be demolished and explores the universe with his best friend, his towel, and a book with “Don’t Panic” written on the cover in large, friendly letters. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (H2G2) is a movie I’ve gone back and forth on in my assessment since its 2005 release. I loved it when I watched it in theaters, hated it on the second watch, and questioned all the plot changes upon third watch. Having sat down for the forty-second time to give it another try, I think I’ve made my piece with this movie. Like Watchmen, for better or for worse this is probably going to be the best H2G2 movie we ever get.

Would I have done things differently? Sure. The Restaurant at the End of the Universe joke at the end would have been better if it hadn’t seemed to shut the door on making a second movie (the second of fixe in the trilogy). If you aren’t familiar with H2G2, come out of your cave and read the Wikipedia plot overview. For the rest of you (who have most likely formed your own opinion of this movie) allow me a pre-tl;dr.

What they got right

Jone’s last line is also one of the funniest of the new material.

1. Casting: Spot-on in most cases, and in a few cases, superior to the BBC series. The core trio of Martin Freeman, Sam Rockwell, and Mos Def are superior to their BBC counterparts (although I’d say it’s a tie in the case of Arthur Dent. Freeman’s Dent is more of a smarmy bastard, while original Dent Simon Jones is more bewildered by everything. Props to the movie directors for giving Jones a cameo as the Magrathean recorded announcement).

2. Tone: Let’s face it, H2G2 is a silly premise. The radio series was little more than a series of gags and jokes, with little to connect them. The movie remains true to the lighthearted spirit of the radio series by never taking itself too seriously. It’s a fluffy movie, which is refreshing in the era of gritty sic-fi.

Like daytime, sparkly vampires, I did not see this coming.

3. Adaptation: From the opening dolphin song, you know this is going to be a new version of H2G2. Douglas Adams excelled at adapting his work to suit the various mediums (more on that below) and this movie does the same. In particular, it isn’t afraid to take chances of presenting familiar plot elements in new ways. (I’m going to single out Zaphod’s stacked two heads for being a refreshing take on the character.)

What they missed

1. Casting: I really want to like Trillian, but Zooey Deschanel seemed cast more for her innate quirkiness than her ability to embody the character. The movie also does a disservice to Trillian’s character by shoehorning in a love triangle, making Trillian little more than a damsel in distress than an interesting character in her own right.

2. Synergy: While most of the movie moves smoothly from scene to scene, a few of the new added scenes feel out of place, without Adam’s trademark wittiness. Most notable is John Malcovich’s Humma Kavula. Don’ get me wrong: Malcovich is terrifying, thanks in part to the special effects used for his character. But his dialogue doesn’t gel with the rest of the story as well.

Love Mark Wing-Davey, but holy hell that is a fake second head.

3. Effects: These are hit and miss. While nothing sinks to the obvious fakness of the BBC TV series, the film looks unpolished in places (most notably the intro, which looks like it was filmed on a sound stage).

Altogether, H2G2 isn’t a great movie, but neither is is a truly bad one. After my countless rematches, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d probably hate this movie a lot more if Douglas Adams was more like George Lucas. Or Ayn Rand.

Let me explain. As a child, I lived and breathed Star Wars. I collected the toys, memorized the movie quotes, and watched the movies themselves over and over and over again. As I grew older, I discovered H2G2 and Atlas Shrugged, two books that had a profound effect on me as a teenager.* Where Douglas Adams succeeded over Ayn Rand was in allowing for the adaptability of his work. Rand protected her words like a dragon hoarding gold, so much she refused a movie version of The Fountainhead unless she wrote the screenplay. Rand didn’t understand the idea of adapting works to suit the medium, and as a result all her movies suffer because they’re filmed novels, rather than their own thing. H2G2 was originally a radio series, then a book, then a television series, all before it was a feature-length movie. Each format has its strengths and weaknesses, but Adams adapted his material to sit the format, changing words here, rearranging plots there, all in an effort to maximize how well his story is told. (Arguably the weakest version is the British miniseries, which is more of a straight adaptation of the book and suffers from pacing problems as a result.)

But what about George Lucas? After all, Lucas is no stranger to adaptation; he’s made a career out of tweaking the Star Wars movies. But where Adams triumphs over Lucas is by allowing each iteration of H2G2 to stand on its own…and remain available. Want to listen to the original radio series? Here you go. Want to read the book? Sure. Watch the TV series? That’s possible to.

Do you want to watch the original Star Wars films as they were originally released? Maybe next year.

The 2005 H2G2 movie contains many elements not found in either the book or radio series, and it omits a lot. But a movie is not a TV show is not a radio show is not a book. I think Adams understood that and he wasn’t afraid to adapt his vision accordingly. (The Point of View gun from the H2G2 movie was an Adams invention; right until the end he was adding new things to his universe.) By allowing for adaptation, Adams helped create a movie that, while not a straight adaptation of his book, was nonetheless enjoyable.

tl;drs

Blank is a blanker version of blank: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy 2005 movie is a lighter, sillier version of the book.

Screen credits over/under: Under. I’ll give the movie some leeway since Douglas Adams was involved in the script before he passed on.

Recommended if you like: British humor, bold casting choices.

Better than I expected: The casting was inspired, especially Mos Def and Sam Rockwell.

Worse than I hoped: There’s a ton of little changes between the book/radio show/movie, but nothing detracts too much.

The HitchHiker’s Guide to the Galaxy would work better as a(n): At this point, the only medium H2G2 hasn’t been in is as an animated series. Or ballet. That’s it; I want an H2G2 ballet.

Verdict: Accept that this is probably the best H2G2 is going to look on the big screen and enjoy it for the silly lighthearted movie it is.

*And while I still enjoy everything about H2G2, I’ve disavowed Ayn Rand. I always enjoyed her stories more than her politics.